BREAKING NEWS: Terror Alert in Chicago, IL

The Chicago Bears football practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance onthe practice field. Head coach Lovie Smith immediately suspendedpractice and called the police and federal investigators. After a complete analysis, FBI forensic experts determined that thewhite substance unknown to players was the GOAL LINE. Practice resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again this season.